Glad I stayed this weekend. Bid farewell to my brother. Grew a little in my skin. Tomorrow I leave for a solo cycling journey down that California coast. I'm already tired.

abbey

a step towards

I finally put it together today. This afternoon.

Spending so much time with my studies I have had time to reflect on the future. To become a Microbiologist, this will be my life for some time. This requires passion. Passion for Biochemistry, Biology, and yearning for knowledge.

Where does my natural ability for intelligence lay? Botany. I am naturally inquisitant about the earth. Not so much the aspect of darwinism, but more the mystery that develops under photosynthesis and into the motion of rejuvenation. The molecular makeup of plants fascinate me! Recycle Carbon Dioxide into Oxygen, nourishment for all living things, (ETC ETC!) and my personal fancy, psychoactive properties.

LSD and hallucinations taken in a spiritual manner changed my life. It allowed me to view, feel, experience reality in the most fascinating way. Since it I have searched for the greater in existence. Once all perceptions and channels are open to the world, we realize, the world is put together in infinite dimensions.

This gave me a great respect for the world of Chemistry. Dr. Hoffman accidentally stumbled on the chemical makeup of LSD. Because of his accident, human beings have been able to experience unexplainable revelations.

Dr. Hoffman wrote a book titled "The Botany and Chemistry of Hallucinations." where reflects and explains the correlation between the chemical make up of plants, humans ability to synthesize compounds in chemistry, and thus (Between Man and Nature) to experience the higher world of hallucinations.

For one to understand how it effects us in the neurological sense, we must understand the molecular structure. Alas, Chemistry.

The most fundamental studies in science on a microscopic level are studied by Microbiologists and Chemists. How we interact and present our findings with different pharmacological compounds (for the medicinal world), change the course of human health. How we come together to study toxicity, between bacterium and its effects on the natural world change the course of the earth.

I here conclude,

I must be able to understand the world of Biochemistry to work within and with the world of Biology.

My passion for Chemistry is derived from my natural fascination and experience of it's incredible compounds.

My natural ability to understand Botany is the direct link between them.

LIFE CHANTS

cacophony of small birds at dawn
may it continue
sticky monkey flowers on bare brown hills
may it continue
bitter taste of early miner's lettuce
may it continue
music on city streets in the summer nights
may it continue
kids laughing on roofs on stoops on the beach in the snow
may it continue
triumphal shout of the newborn
may it continue
deep silence of great rainforests
may it continue
fine austerity of jungle peoples
may it continue
rolling fuck of great whales in turquoise ocean
may it continue
clumsy splash of pelican in smooth bays
may it continue
astonished human eyeball squinting thru aeons at astonished nebulae who squint back
may it continue
clean snow on the mountain
may it continue
fierce eyes, clear of light of the aged
may it continue
rite of birth and of naming
may it continue
rite of instruction
may it continue
rite of passage
may it continue
love in the morning, love in the noon sun
love in the evening among crickets
may it continue
long tales by fire, by window, in fog, in dusk on the mesa
may it continue
the night music
may it continue
grunt of mating hippo, giraffe, foreplay for snow leapord
screeching of cats on the backyard fence
may it continue

without police
may it continue
without prisons
may it continue
without hospitals, death medicine: flu and flu vaccine
may it continue
without madhouses, marriage, highschools that are prisons
may it continue
without empire
may it continue
in sisterhood
may it continue
thru the wars to come
may it continue
in brotherhood
may it continue
tho the earth seem lost
may it continue
thru exile and silence
may it continue
with cunning and love
may it continue
as woman continues
may it continue
as breath continues
may it continue
as stars continue
may it continue

may the wind deal kindly with us
may the fire remember our names
may springs flow, rian fall again
may the land grow green, may it swallow our mistakes

we begin the work
may it continue
the great transmutation
may it continue
a new heaven and a new earth
may it continue
may it continue

DIANE DI PRIMA

I celebrate myself

I have heard what the talkers were talking,

the talk of the beginning and the end,

But I do not talk of the beginning or the end.

Sure as the most certain sure, plumb in the uprights, well
entretied, braced in the beams,
Stout as a horse, affectionate, haughty, electrical,
I and this mystery here we stand.

Clear and sweet is my soul, and clear and sweet is all that is not
my soul.

Showing the best and dividing it from the worst age vexes age,
Knowing the perfect fitness and equanimity of things, while they
discuss I am silent, and go bathe and admire myself.

Trippers and askers surround me,
People I meet, the effect upon me of my early life or the ward and
city I live in, or the nation,
The latest dates, discoveries, inventions, societies, authors old
and new,
My dinner, dress, associates, looks, compliments, dues,
The real or fancied indifference of some man or woman I love,
The sickness of one of my folks or of myself, or ill-doing or loss
or lack of money, or depressions or exaltations,
Battles, the horrors of fratricidal war, the fever of doubtful news,
the fitful events;
These come to me days and nights and go from me again,
But they are not the Me myself.

I bequeath myself to the dirt to grow from the grass I love,
If you want me again look for me under your boot-soles.

You will hardly know who I am or what I mean,
But I shall be good health to you nevertheless,
And filter and fibre your blood.

Continuum

Life. Beauty. Brains. Strength. Courage. Love.

asleep

I wish I had a river, I could skate away on.